The foreplay to expectation

It starts with a conception, a very convenient image where everything seems positive, good, bright and you can hardly find flaws..its perfection enchants you, to the extent that you not only expect now but eagerly await to face it, live it, be in it!

Reality connected to the present with a tiny thread seems irrelevant, something that yoy want to just get over with and set aside like any other inconsequential thing in your life. All you can point out in it is bitter,ghastly at the face of it, in fact, you wouldn't even shy away from calling it miserable.

So there you have it, a weighing balance in your hand with the former and the latter battling it out, but where is the fairness? you are already biased arent you! But as nature and all the fairness embedded in its roots, as the concept of justice not delivered by anybody but delivered by everybody all the same demands, your bias does not go far..your conception crumbles on its feet, thirsting for a drop of hope, but alas! you are not ready to provide it with anything but rejection.

But the question that haunts me is, can you completely eliminate either of these two, your hope and your being? I guess not, although I won't be surprised if someone claims that they can, because we are just too good at convincing ourselves! No one needs to be taught, we see it everyday with our own eyes with regard to almost everything around us, "the little we know, probably the happier we are". Maybe some might differ. Alright "the little we know the more inquisitive we are", how does that sound? But the irony is that this curiosity, more often than not, breeds disappointment, bacause with every question you ask, your expectation rises, but with every answer you get, you just reliase that after all, things around you are too ordinary for you to seek what you might call the 'nirvana of your being', the biggest living cliche probably.

Lets end on a positive note though, no one ever defined this extent of perfection when it came to something as subjective as happiness, so whoever is happy with whatever, all that matters is probably the fact that you are happy!..ngegativity is a breeded worm, somehow it can feed on you even if you have everything in this world bereft of a strong mind and your need for a balance between your extremely volatile mind, your sense of content, and at last,what this is all about, the foreplay to your expectation!

TATD

Philosophy and belief can only form a part of life, significant but with an expiry date appended to every inch of its rigidity.What remains after the implosion is all that is real, so makes it worthwhile talking about relality.

Reality currently involves a conflict in the head. Morality is a very subjective term which can be moulded to sound right as well as wrong. On the other hand, you have to remember that at the end of the day, there are only those counted few faces which the head involuntariliy turns to in distress.They never refuse, they are somehow bound not to.

Brings me to the question of time. Cannot wait for it to grab you by the neck. As I have always believed, life is a bitch, and then you die! Sadly enough, you leave nothing behind of any consequence to your uncertain afterlife. So live it when you can, and face all consequences with your head held high, that is one way of looking at it. The other would be to do all that is considered right. There will be no consequences that you are trained not to deal with and everything can get the aid of everyone.

Somehow though, you never end up making a choice between these two. All we do is go round and round and wait for ourselves to see both merge, it never happens. If there were defined limits to thought process, then humans would have exploited it. The only reason we have not is because we keep outperforming our own limits. We set new ones.

All that remains thus, is your tiny little life with its tiny little moments and the unforgiving second that fills every gap. The attempt thus will be, strange as it may sound..to hold out that tiny piece of parchment and let it get wet, just so it goes beyond everything that binds it..ink..someone's opinion..a sacrosanct moment of truth..everything!let it be a blur, incoherent and independent.The consequences shall be embraced, with arms wide open!..As someone said to me..these are the days...

A poor man's prophecy

A black screen, full of what cannot be defined, what cannot be seen and what definitely cannot be felt from an outsider's point of view. A white image makes its way to the top of a white line that forms in the meantime, dividing the screen into three parts. The part behind the line, the past. In front of the line, the future. On the line i stand.

Life begins here, actually its not a beginning, its a start, one of those distinctions you make to maintain your peace of mind just so you can make your philosophy count. The beginning awaits, sometime in the future maybe, but time is the best player around! Don't know how many it will beat, but count me in for sure.

Etymology

Most names have a story..and most stories do not know when and how they began. This one is a little more specific though, and yet very vague in the sense that it personifies the limitless invisible boundaries wherein we try finding our defined corner, sometimes we succeed, sometimes we fail.

The beauty of it though, is that the attempt never dies out, and we keep trying. Beginnings make way for more beginnings, we convince ourselves that each one is as novel as the previous, and we fall into the loop. I've just fallen into mine, and so i write.