The end of the battle and the first day of freedom.

We all want conflicts to end, but once they do, we realise that it was so much fun when anarchy and all its aspects took over us, our impulses had the courage to yield negative without a care for the world. We were disoriented, the mind was chaotic, but it was fun!

Time though, has something else in store for the average human mind.As much as you would want it to go on forever, the conflict in your head would probably come to a mutual understanding with your expectations and reality as you see it, and soon, you have come to a state of calm, where things seem resolved, here you are,you have for the time being, sorted out what was eating you up for all these days, months, years, and yet, you just don't find yourself happy.

Its probably because the biggest of problems is when you do not have a problem to deal with. I gave myself time, to only bide more time, put myself on probation like I am new technology, cleared it all out, which is probably never easy, and set myself up for a place of no conflict. I obviously needed time to come to terms with that, after all, it takes you time for everything, even to realise that you are happy!

And so what was never in my control, what I never probably had a strong hold of, what constitutes years and years of mindless motion up and down in a space indifferent to me and to which i was inconsequential, i obviously needed to wage war when i was good enough, and I did, and right now, I am the victor.

The first day of freedom is worst than any battle though, you feel completely helpless, completely unprepared, apprehensive, but you are excited all the same, you have something to look forward to, you have something to hope for, and as of now, that is the biggest form of happiness I can get, so kudos to my battle, kudos to my victory and kudos to the first day of my freedom...